bear hug

a psychic once told me
"you have a spirit hovering around you
I see a man, an older bearded man"
I thought it was my grandpa
(who I never met)
keeping tabs on his fourth's genes
handsome in that picture
he looked right through me
later
(when I was reading a lot of science fiction)
I thought it was a man
I could only meet
using a time machine
that perhaps we held hands
covered in space
later
(when my heart was broken)
I was sure it was an enemy
a poltergeist jealous of love
who cut my hair
who hated me
later
(when my heart was shattered)
I was sure it was an angel
Naked and dark winged
even in the light
who did not weep as he slept on my back
through that horrible night
now
(when I walk the streets alone)
I can feel him lumbering in his bear coat
his shadow tickling my knee
I'll keep him
there is nothing else to do

but if you see him
don't be too scared
or try feed him

he will always  be there
and if I say so
he won't bite you

on the loom

i flew
like a crane
my neck stretched back
calling for calling for you you
through a night
stars and clouds
etched my flight
cold bursting with joy
i stretched my neck again
callingcalling you for you

tracing trees and their samurai leaves
with my wild eye
as i fly
color and breath bleed out

it is only you i long to see
stretched neck
i shout

when a tsunami froths over me
and in my glee
my wings long for sea
harden to fin
i dip again
last calling
for you
you
and i kamikaze in

guts

In the city
I'll take you
against the glass walls of money
in the alley between immigrant conglomerates
at the bottom of the pit where death had her way

In the jungle
you can have me
under raining leaves feeding their trees
on the backs of tigers tearing their meat
in the murky river
between piranha teeth

in the desert
we can wrestle
camouflaged by dunes
while angel mites meet us to drink
within the roots of dying palms
where lizards kiss tongue to tail
in a mirage
with chocolate that never melts
and our sunburns taste like freckles

in the mountains
you can watch me
as I melt snow with my breathe
carve out caves with my grip
my forever hair
tangled
in the nettled pines

And I will feel your eyes
like two black moons
leading me on the path
calling me to howl

new friends

a spy dances on pointed toe
keeping thought balloons from popping to soon
HisHer beret
captures and disguises
every sly glance
given or given away

Discreet impressions tikky typed in memory
waiting for a sexier scene
kissing for quiet
and laughing for fear
till here comes the secret in
cloak and mist
to the tune of a lonely whistle
Grabbed and bagged
ziplock for the 24 mile swim

we wait with cigarettes
for HisHer silent din

Wounded? Bleeding?  Last breaths?
It gives me such a thrill
but let me sleep
If there is a funeral tell me tomorrow.

lol in public places

honestly, and this is embarrassing
I thought we were having a conversation
I mean,
I know  I'm delusional
but there was a sparkler lit
in belief
and you know
those things seem to last forever
smoke and light so bright
it's like you're not really seeing it
but there it is
even when you blink
Just remembering
just now
I believe

I think the room is empty now
did you say goodbye?
all I hear is the echo of my
hello
lo